April 30, 2007

Cruising Jake Cruise

In all honesty, the whole straight boy thing doesn't really do it for me. The suspension of disbelief seems to be endless in the gay community where we actually believe that the guy with a raging hard-on, getting fisted is actually heterosexual. You may not be gay, but if you're getting off on being fucked by men – you ain't straight either. And if you're not in to it, well, it really isn't too hot.

With that being said, I've been getting in to supposedly straight boys on screen lately. The reason is I recently discovered Jake Cruise. Late, I know, but I never really looked for the muscley, jock types, and I still don't. But I'm way, WAY, in to Jake himself. Everything that's been written about him seems to focus on the fact that he's middle aged and has a slight weight issue but still gets to score with hunky looking guys. I would say the main reason is that Jake himself is a fucking babe. He's got the cutest smile, big puppy eyes and a fatherly demeanor. Of course he gets to experiment with the bi-curious crowd. He makes them feel secure. Jake does a site on straight boys having sex with girls aimed towards gay men called "Straight Guys For Gay Eyes" but that line couldn't interest me less. What gets my rocks off is when Jake enters the movies himself as he tends to do on the original site, "JakeCruise.com".

Jake himself has said in interviews that he doesn't give a shit about if guys are straight or not. So I guess I don't have to get an imaginary girlfriend to cruise Mr. Cruise. I do however need to start going to the gym and shave off my beard and body hair if the guys on "JakeCruise.com" is any indication on what this hot daddy likes. Would you have me then, Jake?

By Tom Ass

Posted by lavenderlounge at 11:12 AM

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